Divorce is hard on everyone in the family, but it is especially difficult for children. Their security becomes threatened, and they often experience psychological challenges during this time.
Therefore, you and your former spouse need to develop a co-parenting partnership that helps your children through these changes. These are some co-parenting tips you should consider.
Set aside your feelings
You may feel betrayed, hurt or angry with your former spouse, but your children do not need to see or hear about your feelings. They need you to listen to and help them work through their own emotions. Talk with a counselor or trusted friend, not your children, about your feelings. Also, avoid allowing them to seep into your communication with your spouse, especially when your children are present.
Pursue open communication with your former spouse
You and your former spouse need to be aware of what your children feel and do. The best way to stay informed includes pursuing open communication. Set aside time to speak regularly. Catch each other up on the children. You may know something your former spouse does not and vice versa.
As difficult as it may seem, approach these conversations like a business meeting, without emotion. Listen to your co-parent and frame your needs as requests.
Avoid putting your children in the middle
Never use your children as the go-between because you do not want to speak with your co-parent. Also, never put them in the middle of an argument or your relationship. Avoid saying negative things about your ex or making your children feel that they have to choose between the two of you. Support your children’s relationship with your former spouse and ask questions about their time together.
The best results come when you and your former spouse form a co-parenting team.